The Toughest Part of the Year

As 2008 comes to a close, I can look back at one time as the most difficult part of the year. It came in April with the death of my grandmother. I was able to visit her in the hospital two days before she died, which was a blessing to see her one last time after not seeing her for at least a year. The next weekend I was asked to speak at the memorial service, I agreed without knowing what I would say. Despite the countless speeches and sermons that I had given in the past four or five year, I was in no way prepared, I struggle through the tears and said what I had wanted to say. For a while I was thinking that I should post what I had said but I did not want to reconsider the reality of loss once again. I nevertheless push through that struggle and present it to you.

The Second Century Christian Theologian Iraneus wrote about the Rule of Faith, the idea that those who come before us pass on the faith, for me this heritage of faith is from Ruth Foat, although I call her Grandma. I can still remember as a young child grandma teaching me the books of the Bible, to this day I can remember Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus and Numbers. It all gets hazy from there but I remember learning it from grandma. Years after learning the names of the books with grandma, the seeds grew into faith. That faith has changed me and led me to where I am today.

I was blessed that last weekend I was able to go visit her in the hospital. She talked to me about being led by the Spirit so that she would have immediate repentance and obedience to the voice of God. Her desire was to be more intimate and to have nothing hindering her journey. I hope that I can grow to that as well.

The thing that inspired me the most in my visit was her love for God’s Word. Since her arrival she had been reading through the New Testament, using a book that showed what the Jewish understanding metaphors and stories. Despite her situation she knew there was more to understand, she earnestly desired to know more about the Scripture to learn more about God. Her faith brought her to seek understanding no matter the circumstance. Her faith impacted every layer of her being, it was not a faith that did not waiver. She affirmed in me an understanding of God that goes beyond simple morality but reached to a solid theology.
In the end she was selfless, her first words to me when I visited were “You do the talking, tell me everything about your studies and your church. It wasn’t about what she could tell me or what was going on with her, she wanted to hear about me. My hope is that I can come to a place in my life where I can have that same attitude.

Today I reflect on a life well lived and worthy of imitation.